We’ve all encountered painful situations in life. They could be events that happened in our personal lives, close relationships, work, family, or within a larger collective culture.
The situation could be something as extreme as atrocious acts committed against you or people you love. Or it could be words someone said that left a lasting painful impact on you.
The process of forgiving someone for hurting you can feel downright impossible, especially if the experience impacted your life for years to come.
However, lack of forgiveness doesn’t make the situation go away–in fact, it only keeps it with you longer. There’s a saying that “Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”
Forgiveness isn’t something we do for the other person–it’s something we do for ourselves.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean condoning a person’s behavior. It means freeing yourself so that you’re no longer controlled or limited by what happened in your past. By letting events be what they are, and opening to forgiveness when we need to, we’re creating more space within ourselves for miracles.
Perhaps you’ve heard about Nelson Mandela’s story of forgiveness. He was in jail for 27 years and part-way through that time, he made a conscious decision to forgive his jailers and to love them in spite of the fact that they were beating and abusing him. He knew that otherwise, a life in jail was going to kill his spirit. So he ended up forgiving and loving these jailers.
Over time, they could no longer beat him up. They had so much care and regard for him. In fact, when he was president of South Africa, some of his jailers ended up becoming his bodyguards and sitting in the front row during his inauguration. Forgiveness can create miracles.
As you see from Nelson Mandela’s story, a wonderful byproduct of forgiveness can also be freeing the other person. Now that’s living in the Miracle Zone.
A powerful forgiveness technique is the Ho’oponopono prayer, an ancient Hawaiian Kahuna practice of reconciliation and forgiveness.
When heavy feelings like anger or resentment come up about a person or a situation, you can sit quietly with your hand on your heart and say the prayer silently (“I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.”).
By practicing the Ho’oponopono prayer, you’re healing your part of the wrong that was done. This creates a shift in your energy, which ultimately shifts the energy of the relationship.
We invite you to try out this Ho’oponopono prayer–you may need to practice for weeks or months until you feel a shift–and discover what miracles can come through the practice of forgiveness.
“Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.” ~ Bishop Desmond Tutu